couple of days ago while surfing on net came across the writings n conception of SAROJINI SAHOO... her each & every word gave solid forms to my vague thoughts n concerns about the issue.she has a blog " Sense & Sensuality " where one can read quite rebellious stories n thoughts though i can never approve of free-sexual relations or extra-marital affairs......following is some exerpts from her interview
and her brief intro .....
SAROJINI SAHOO IS A distinguished feminist writer, novelist, and author of several short story anthologies, Sarojini Sahoo was born in 1956 in Orissa, India. She earned MA and Ph.D. degrees in Oriya literature - as well as a Bachelor of Law degree - from Utkal University. A college instructor, she has been honored with a number of awards and her works have been translated into several languages.
Many of Dr. Sahoo's writings deal candidly with female sexuality, the emotional lives of women, and the intricate fabric of human relationships. Her blog, Sense & Sensuality, explores why sexuality plays a major role in our understanding of Eastern feminism
Is feminism in India different from feminism in the West?
At one time in India - in the ancient Vedic period - there were equal rights between men and women and even feminist law makers like Gargi and Maitreyi . But the later Vedic period polarized the sexes. Males oppressed females and treated them as 'other' or similar to a lower caste.
Today, patriarchy is just one of the hierarchies which keep females down, oppressed by the traditional system.
So what does this mean for men and women who marry? In the West we like to think of marriage as an equal partnership. Couples marry for love; few would consider an arranged marriage.
In India, arranged marriages are always preferred. Love marriages are viewed as a social sin and are regarded with shame. Many Indians contend that arranged marriages are more successful than marriages in the West, where staggering divorce rates are the rule. They argue that romantic love does not necessarily lead to a good marriage, and often fails once the passion dissipates, whereas real love flows from a properly arranged union between two individuals.
Unwed mothers, separated, single or unfaithful women are considered outcasts. Living out of wedlock with a partner is still virtually unheard of. An unmarried daughter -- seen as a spinster even in her late twenties -- brings shame upon her parents, and is a burden. But once married, she is considered the property of her in-laws.
Much of your work focuses on women and sexuality. What can you tell us about Eastern women in that regard?
To understand Eastern feminism, one must understand the important role sexuality plays in our culture.
Let's consider a girl's situation during adolescence. If she becomes pregnant, the male partner is not blamed for his role. It is the girl who has to suffer. If she accepts the child, she suffers a great deal socially and if she has an abortion, she suffers emotionally for the rest of her life.
In the case of a married woman, she encounters many restrictions with respect to sexuality whereas her male partner is free from these restrictions. Women are denied the right to express themselves as sexual beings. They are discouraged from taking an active role or even allowing themselves to experience the act as pleasurable. Women are taught that they should not be open to their sexual desires.
Even today in Eastern countries, you will find many married women who have never experienced an orgasm. If a female admits to feeling sexual pleasure, her own husband may misunderstand her and regard her as a bad woman, believing she has engaged in premarital sex......
Much of your work focuses on women and sexuality. What can you tell us about Eastern women in that regard?
To understand Eastern feminism, one must understand the important role sexuality plays in our culture.
Let's consider a girl's situation during adolescence. If she becomes pregnant, the male partner is not blamed for his role. It is the girl who has to suffer. If she accepts the child, she suffers a great deal socially and if she has an abortion, she suffers emotionally for the rest of her life.
In the case of a married woman, she encounters many restrictions with respect to sexuality whereas her male partner is free from these restrictions. Women are denied the right to express themselves as sexual beings. They are discouraged from taking an active role or even allowing themselves to experience the act as pleasurable. Women are taught that they should not be open to their sexual desires.
Even today in Eastern countries, you will find many married women who have never experienced an orgasm. If a female admits to feeling sexual pleasure, her own husband may misunderstand her and regard her as a bad woman, believing she has engaged in premarital sex....
following is the link to this interview...( will try to publish it all in second episode)
http://womensissues.about.com/od/feminismequalrights/a/FeminisminIndia_2.htm
I have gone through Sarojini Sahoo’s novel The Dark Abode . Kuki, the central character of novel, is a wife of Aniket, An IIT ian working in ‘Mumbai’ and drawing very good salary but she was not emotionally and physically satisfied with him due to his short tempered nature. This loneliness diverted his wife to fall in love with a Muslim Artist from ‘Pakistan’ named Safik through Cyber-media. The long series of love conversations between Safik and Kuki was mostly a fantasy. The acceptance level of feminine psychology of Kuki was so high that she took him as ardent life partner. In spite of her knowledge that Safik was a lascivious and lecherous person who had made contact with variety of 52 women but, still Kuki was very assertative about the artist. Moreover, being mother of two children, she was very happy to make a Cyber relationship with ‘Safik’. Indeed, the novel portrayed the relationship between different religions, different countries with different background even bitter relationship and animosity made by transgression and obsession.
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thanx dear for such a wonderful info....agreed with it n as developing countries we have to fight a lot about the taboos that people find an embarresment to discuss on...
ReplyDeletei remember my grandma's memories of her young beautiful sister who died of complexities out of a normal monthly process js because their parents found it obscene to guide on health related topics...stay in touch for ur valued opinions...